Hold My Heart
by YoureGorgeousMyFriend
Summary: Set after 3.02, Jane and Maura finally have their friendship back. But what happens when one of them realizes friendship isn't enough anymore?
1. Chapter 1

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 1**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters (obviously, but just in case!)

**A/N:** Special thanks to my friend and amazing "beta" **MegannRosemary** even though she's way more than just a beta! I would have never been brave enough to finish and post this story without her. Thanks for all your encouragement and perfect comments and suggestions.

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All those weeks when Maura was mad at her had been one of the worst times of her life; they had seemed like an eternally long and painful time. Not only she felt incredibly lonely, not having her best friend to talk to, but it was hell knowing that Maura _hated_ her. And she knew she deserved it, she really had screwed up. Jane didn't think Maura was ever going to be able to forgive her and that thought alone made it hard to breathe. But after the near death experience they had both shared at the reservoir, they came to their senses and apologized to each other. Jane was so grateful to get another chance to make things right with Maura. She was so happy to be able to hug her best friend again. It was the best feeling in the whole world and she never wanted to let go….

Things were going well and their friendship was almost back to normal. Jane was back to teasing Maura and making her laugh. _God that amazing laugh Maura has_. Yeah things were good. Until the zombie…

"Maura, you really are going out with the zombie again? I mean, doesn't he kinda freak you out? He totally freaks _me_ out!" Jane wasn´t able to hide how annoyed she was, even through sarcasm.

"No, he is actually quite nice Jane. I have a really good time with him." Maura replied, smiling.

"When you're not getting _arrested_... Sorry, um well have fun," she said with a hint of hurt in her voice and headed out the door.

"See you tomorrow Jane." Maura was left wondering what had gotten into her friend.

Jane left the precinct wondering why her chest felt so heavy and she really just wanted to punch something… or _someone_.

She drove home in silence walked into the apartment and plopped down on the couch. "Hi Joe... I'll walk you in a minute I promise. You know, I just got Maura back it really sucked not having her in my life. And now I feel like I'm losing her again…" she sighed. Joe stared at her, seeming to understand her owners' sadness.

While she was walking Joe, all she could think of was Maura… out on a date with the stupid zombie. I mean what could she possibly see in him? Maura deserved so much better. Maura deserved the best. Come to think about it, no one seemed to be good enough for Maura.

After getting back home, Jane grabbed a beer and sat on her couch, downing it. "I don't understand why I feel so crappy." She said to herself. Her eyes were tearing up. "What the hell Rizzoli, what's wrong with you? I must be coming down with something". She grabbed another beer and turned the tv on, not really watching anything. Commercials flickered by, tv shows blurred into one another, and beer after beer found their way into her hands. She lost track of all concepts of time and her conscious thoughts slipped away.

_Maura was supposed to meet Jane at the Dirty Robber for a drink but she was not there. That was not like Maura at all to be late. She called her but she wasn´t answering her phone. After waiting for about 30 minutes Jane started to freak out thinking that something might have happened to her friend._

_She left the Dirty Robber, got in her car and sped all the way to Maura's house. She didn´t even bother knocking and just used the key she had. She started searching the whole house, finding no one. "Maura? Where are you?" She called out. She tried calling her cell phone again, but it went straight to voice mail. Then she saw the note on the living room table her had shaking as she held it and read it out loud, "If you ever want to see your friend Dr. Isles again, you will do exactly as I say. Go to the abandoned warehouse by 7__th__ street. Be there alone or else, the good Doctor will pay." Jane was terrified her heart was beating so hard it felt like it was going to jump out of her chest and the tightness on her chest making breathing a really difficult task. "No, God, don't let Maura get hurt… please". _

_She got to the warehouse as fast as humanly possible, she walked inside not really bothering to be quiet. She scanned the place and saw someone at the far end of the place on the floor, she knew it was Maura. _

_She ran to her as fast as possible, panicking as she saw Maura was lying in a pool of her own blood._

_ "NOOOO!" Jane screamed._

She sat straight up on the couch, her throat burning from her desperate scream, gasping for air her eyes wide with panic and shaking uncontrollably. She fought for a few minutes to get her breathing under control, but it proved harder than she thought. She wiped the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. "What the hell was that fucking nightmare about... Jesus! Maura is fine… she's probably still on her date… she's fine." She repeated trying to calm herself to no avail. She glanced at her watch, it was only around midnight. "I should go over and check up on her… God no, what the hell is wrong with me! I may interrupt something… maybe I'll call her? Damnit Rizzoli just forget about it, it was just a nightmare!" She tried to calm down and convince herself about the absurdity of being so shaken up by a nightmare, but she couldn't get rid of the tightness on her chest and decided she wouldn't be able to sleep all night if she didn't know Maura was ok. So she grabbed her cell, her hand still shaking and called her, breathing deeply to attempt to cover how scared she really was, she didn't want Maura to think anything was wrong. "Jane?" Maura answered sleepily.

"Maur, um I'm so sorry, did I wake you up? I guess I did…" _Voice steady Rizzoli or she'll know something is up_.

"Yeah, but it's ok. Are you ok?" Maura asked worrying now.

"Fine Maur, I thought you'd still be out on your date. I'm really sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep." Jane said feeling relieved, but still not able to shake the horrible nightmare off.

"Jane wait. Why did you call me?" Maura knew Jane too well to think that she´d call her in the middle of the night with no good reason.

"Um…." Shit, _didn't think this far ahead, did you_. "I just… didn't realize it was so late. It was nothing important, really."

"Jane. You know I can tell when you're lying. I don't know why you even try. Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do Maur! You know I do! It's just…. It's silly, ok? I just… had a nightmare." She finished almost a whisper.

"Oh Jane. Was it about Hoyt? Do you need me to come over?"

Jane couldn't help but smile a little at her friend. "No Maur, it wasn't about Hoyt. You really should go back to sleep, I'll see you in the morning ok?"

"Ok, if you're sure. You can call me anytime Jane, you know that right?"

"I know Maur. Thanks. Goodnight."

"Goodnight Jane."

Jane hung up the phone, feeling a bit relieved after hearing Maura's voice and knowing that she was ok. She knew she wasn't going to be able to sleep, and wished she had Maura sleeping next to her, that always managed to calm her down, but she wasn't going to bother her friend again. So she lay in bed awake with the horrible feeling of loss the nightmare had left her with. Images of Maura smiling and laughing alternated with images from her dream, ones she wished she had never seen, and they made her shiver. Trying to rid herself of those thoughts, her mind wandered to some of the moments she and Maura had shared. The first night she had slept over at Maura´s even though the circumstances had been scary, she always thought about that as a special night they had shared. She smiled to herself thinking how Maura always looked like she was going to walk down a Paris runway... It was going to be a very long night.

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This will be a multi chapter story, I already have a few written out. Let me know what you think? :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 2**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** Special thanks to my friend and amazing "beta" **MegannRosemary**. I really couldn't do this without you. :)

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The next morning Jane had gotten to work much earlier than she needed to. Since she couldn´t sleep she figured she may as well be doing something productive. Or try to, at least.

Maura walked into the precinct at her usual time, and went right up to Jane's desk. Taking in her friends' appearance, she stated, "Good morning Jane. You look exhausted."

"Thanks Maur, you look great too." She replied dryly, barely looking up at Maura.

"Did you have coffee already? Would you like to go get some with me?" Maura asked hopeful that Jane would agree, she was concerned and was set on getting her to talk about what was bothering her.

"I'm fine Maura thanks, I already had some." Jane didn´t lift her eyes from the paperwork she had on her desk this time.

Maura looked at her friend with uncertainty, but decided not to push. "Ok, let me know if you want to have lunch or something." She turned heading to the elevator, and Jane watched her leave and sighed.

Jane didn't know why she was acting so cold and distant towards Maura. She didn't do anything wrong. Jane figured she was probably feeling vulnerable, because she had just gotten her friend back, after thinking that she had lost her forever. She was so afraid to mess things up. And she had been so completely terrified at the thought of something happening to Maura. "I can't lose her," she whispered to herself, rubbing her temples.

Jane attempted to get some paperwork done, but concentrating seemed to be a difficult task today. No matter what she did, her thoughts always drifted back to Maura. Sighing again, she decided to go downstairs and give Maura some kind of explanation. She wasn´t sure what she was going to say, but she knew she had acted like a jerk and had no reason to.

"Hey." Jane said quietly.

"Jane. I'm glad you're here."

"Listen, can we talk for a bit?"

"Sure. Let's go to my office." They both walked into Maura's office, Jane rubbing the scars on her hands nervously. "So, what's the matter Jane?"

"I just wanted to apologize for being a jerk earlier. You didn't deserve it. I'm sorry Maur."

Maura couldn´t help to notice the sadness in her friends´ eyes. "It's ok Jane. You really look exhausted. Would you like to talk about whatever is bothering you?"

"Not really… how was your date with the zombie?" Jane asked, trying to make small talk, her eyes staring at the floor.

"It was nice, we had dinner. I went home early though, I was a little tired."

"Oh." Was all Jane said.

"Jane" Maura said seriously "Would you please talk to me? I'm worried about you. Please?"

"Can we talk after work? I … um… I'd just rather talk when we are not here, ok?"

"Ok. Do you want to come over to my place at 6? I'll make dinner." Maura asked hoping Jane would agree.

"Sure. See you then. Thanks Maur, and um… I'm sorry." Jane went back upstairs to her desk, stared at the pile of paperwork she had piled there. She sat down and crossed her arms on her desk, burying her head in them, letting out a frustrated groan.

"You alright there Rizzoli?" Korsak asked.

"Fine, Korsak. Listen I'm gonna get going, ok?"

"Ok Jane. Let me know if you need anything ok?"

She just nodded and left. There was no point being at work anyway. But now having extra time at home meant she had extra time to get nervous about dinner. _It's just Maura, why am I so freaking nervous! I have NOTHING to wear, she was right about that. _

It was exactly 6 pm when Maura heard her doorbell. She hurried over to open the door and saw Jane, looking gorgeous, but there was something different in her eyes. She looked… scared? Maura wasn't sure, even after trying to analyze all of Jane's facial muscles.

"Jane. Hi, please come in."

"Hi. It smells really good."

"Thank you. I hope you like it. Are you hungry?"

"Yeah." Jane said, even though eating was the last thing on her mind that moment. She wasn't going to let Maura's effort go to waste though. So they sat and ate in relative silence. "That was delicious Maura, thank you."

"I'm glad you liked it Jane. Come with me; let's move to the living room. I need you to talk to me, can you tell me what´s going on?" Maura asked carefully.

Jane looked at her, then stared at her own hands. "Maura, you know that… the time when we weren't talking was really hard for me… I … I thought I had lost you for good, and…" Jane was trying so hard not to let her emotions show but failing. "I just don't want to lose you…" Jane finished just above a whisper.

"Jane, it was awful for me too. You're not going to lose me. I'm here and I´m not going anywhere. Can you look at me please?" She said reaching out to hold Jane's hands. Jane looked up and into Maura's beautiful hazel eyes, and couldn't hold it together anymore, her eyes filling up with tears.

"Maur…" she started with a sniffle, "the nightmare I had… it was about you… I …. God…" She buried her face in her hands and started crying, needing to get it out of her system. Maura moved closer and held her tightly, softly rubbing her back. Jane tried to continue between her quiet sobs. "You… were missing… I couldn't help you… when I found you… you…" She couldn't finish, her sobs were heartbreaking and Maura could only hold her and try to calm her friend down.

"Shhh Jane, it's ok sweetie, it's ok," Maura whispered.

After a few minutes went by, Jane started to relax into Maura's embrace and managed to get her crying under control. It felt so good to be in her arms she didn't want to move. Hell, she didn't want to breathe. She looked up to see Maura, who had also tears running down her face.

"I'm so sorry Maura, I'm a mess. I didn't mean to make you cry, I hate it when you cry. And I got your shirt all wet; it's probably a dry clean only shirt. I hope I didn't mess it up." Jane attempted to lighten the mood.

"Jane, you know that you're not only the best friend I've ever had, you're the most important person in my life. You're not going to lose me because I can't lose you; I need you in my life. I am so sorry for the way I acted towards you, I know I hurt you deeply, and it's most likely the reason why you had that awful nightmare. But I promise I'm not going anywhere. Ok?" Maura reached out and softly lifted Jane´s chin so that she could look into those deep brown eyes.

Jane shook her head and whispered "Ok."

"Come on, let's go to bed. I know you didn't get a lot of sleep last night, you need to get some rest."

Jane got up and headed towards the guest bedroom but Maura held onto her wrist and stopped her.

"What is it?" Jane asked.

"Would you stay with me tonight? I mean in my room. Please?" Maura gave her one of those irresistible smiles.

"Sure." Jane replied as if it was no big deal at all. Because it wasn't a big deal, was it?

Maura handed her something for her to wear to bed. They both went through their night time routine, brushed their teeth and in a few minutes they were ready for bed. Jane was lying on her back staring at the ceiling too many thoughts running through her mind. She thought she'd never fall asleep, but the exhaustion from the night before, plus the comforting feeling of having Maura lying next to her, made her feel so relaxed, that she was asleep within minutes.

Maura had trouble falling asleep. She was concerned about her friend and wasn't sure how to help her. Jane was not acting like her usual self lately. She knew about the nightmare now, but could that be bothering her so much? Maura could read Jane pretty well most of the time, but not this time.

She felt relieved when she finally heard Jane's breathing evening out, which indicated she was asleep. Shortly after that she drifted off too.

A few hours later Maura woke up to whimpering noises next to her, she opened her eyes to see a very restless Jane. She wasn´t sure what she should do and then she heard Jane cry out softly.

"No…. please," It broke Maura's heart. She sounded so fragile; even though that's a word she never thought she'd use referring to Jane. She reached out to rub Jane's arm and try to wake her up, but it wasn't working and Jane was getting more restless.

She cried out again "Maura…. no, please Maur….."

She had to wake her up "Jane, honey please wake up," she said shaking Jane gently. She was unsuccessful and Jane started thrashing letting out a piercing scream "NO!" she seemed terrified, her breathing was erratic and she wasn't waking up. All Maura could think of doing was holding her close to try to get her to calm down. So she pulled Jane close to her, rolling her halfway on top of her, as she rubbed her back and whispered reassuring words. After a few minutes, Jane finally started to calm down, and she seemed to be sleeping peacefully again. Maura had been with Jane when she had nightmares before. This one seemed very intense though, and her heart hurt for her friend. She brushed a strand of Jane's hair back, hoping that she wouldn't have any more nightmares.

When Jane woke up the next morning she was very disoriented. She was lying on top of someone… "Maura…" she whispered as she realized where she was. She didn't know how she had ended up on top of the honey blonde, and she was mortified for a second… but it felt so good. Maura felt so soft, smelled so nice… and Jane felt so safe. She never wanted to move, but knew she had to, hopefully without waking Maura up. She was starting to move very slowly and carefully, when she heard her speak.

"Good morning Jane. How do you feel?" Maura said, brushing her hand over Jane's hair softly.

"Um… Maur… I'm so sorry, I don't know…" She said moving herself off of Maura.

"Shh hey, it's ok. You don't need to apologize. I pulled you closer to me last night."

"You w-what? Why?" Jane asked clearly puzzled.

"You seemed to be having a really bad nightmare. Nothing else worked, I couldn't wake you up. When I pulled you close to me, you seemed to calm down." Maura explained simply.

"Maura I'm so sorry, for waking you up, for…." Jane didn´t know where to start apologizing anymore.

"Jane really, there's no need to apologize. Do you want to talk about it? Do you remember what the nightmare was about?"

Jane just shook her head unable to meet Maura's eyes.

"If you do want to talk about it, you can, ok? I'll go make us some coffee." With that Maura got up, put on her robe and went downstairs to the kitchen.

Jane was left alone with her thoughts. Her feelings of waking up with Maura holding her, feeling their bodies so close, Maura´s softness, it was all so overwhelming. Her thoughts drifted to how it would feel to kiss Maura's perfect lips, to touch her incredibly soft skin…. "Oh my God" Jane whispered the realization suddenly hitting her. _I can´t be thinking like this, I can´t be feeling like this, what the HELL is wrong with me? Maura is my best friend, I almost lost her, I can´t lose her…. _Jane was lost in her thoughts when Maura walked back in the room carrying two cups of coffee. Jane stared at her looking terrified.

"Jane?"

Jane stood up quickly without looking at Maura and said "I… I need to go." She moved to leave but Maura stopped her, reaching out to hold her arm and making her turn around.

"Jane talk to me. What's going on? Please." Maura begged, knowing that something was really wrong with her.

"Nothing Maura, I really need to go. Thanks for um... everything. I´ll see ya soon." With that she left quickly, leaving behind a very stunned Maura. She had no idea what made Jane leave like that, she was very confused, but more than anything worried about her friend. Very rarely she had seen Jane look so lost. She wanted to call her, go over to her apartment… but if Jane needed some time alone, for whatever reason it was, she should probably respect that.

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Let me know what you think? Suggestions and constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.

AN2: Thanks so much for all the reviews, favorites and follows I am completely amazed at the response! Not all updates will be this fast though, I had this one already written and decided not to make you guys wait. ;)

AN3: This story will NOT follow what happened in 3.10 with Dennis. Think of it as an AU after 3.02.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 3**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** Special thanks to my friend and amazing "beta" **MegannRosemary**. I really couldn't do this without you. :)

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Jane arrived to her place, still shocked at everything that had been going through her mind, and collapsed on her bed._ God, where did this all come from? How long have I felt this way about her? This can't be! I can't lose her… I need her…She's my best friend! _"Damnit! I'm fucking staying in bed all day." She covered her face with her pillow letting out a frustrated groan. She felt so guilty for leaving Maura without any explanation but she just didn't know what to say. She couldn't even look at her because she was so afraid that her friend would be able to read everything just from the look in her eyes. Her thoughts drifted to how absolutely perfect Maura was, how everything about her was completely flawless… She shook her head, trying to get rid of the thoughts that were invading her mind.

She was startled by her cell buzzing on her belt; she didn't need to look to know who it was.

**M: Are you ok? I'm worried, Jane.**

Jane sighed, of course Maura was worried, she had left her house like she was running away from the devil itself.

**J: I'm fine Maura. Sorry for worrying you. I just need some time alone.**

**M: Ok. Let me know if you need anything.**

Maura… who was always so sweet and caring, such a good friend… _And I´m going to mess everything… Again. _She hugged her pillow tight and let out a choked sob. _God, I think I´m in love with her. What am I going to do? I can´t do this! There is no way she would feel the same way about me… _A fresh wave of sobs wracked her frame over and over until she was sure she had no more tears left in her.

The rest of the weekend went by without Jane leaving her apartment, barely even leaving her bed except to punch the dummy for a while so she could take out her anger on something…

"I'm so fucking scared," she said letting out a nervous laugh. "I can do this. It's just Maura…" but just the thought of the Medical Examiner made her heart skip a beat. "Shit." She took a deep breath trying to calm the turmoil of emotions inside of her.

Jane came to the conclusion that she needed to act like nothing happened on Monday, she wasn't going to risk losing Maura, so she was going to act like the friend she was. She'd have to use her best acting skills, because Maura could usually read her like an open book. She had barely slept all weekend, so that wasn´t going to be easy to cover up from the observant doctor.

Monday came around too fast, and Jane figured she had to make an effort to pretend that everything was normal. So she sent Maura a message.

**J: Hey, wanna meet for coffee?**

**M: Sure, I´m almost there.**

Jane saw Maura approaching, looking breathtaking as always, _God this is going to be harder than I had thought. _She prayed that the other woman wouldn't push anything and just allow things to go back to "normal", whatever that meant.

"Hi Jane."

"Hey. Got your coffee already." Jane said handing her the coffee and making an effort to smile at the honey blonde.

"Thank you. Are you feeling ok?" Of course Maura would notice.

"I'm fine Maur. Stop diagnosing me." Jane shook her head. She couldn´t hide anything from her friend.

"I´m not, I´m just…"

"Concerned, I know." She cut her off. "Well don´t be. Listen I gotta get to work. See you later." _Well that didn´t go very well. How the hell am I supposed to keep all these feelings bottled up… Shit!_

Jane walked into the bullpen putting on her best _I´m doing great_ face. "Hey guys."

"Hey Rizzoli."

"Hey partner." Both men said at the same time. They looked at each other, knowing that something was up with Jane, but neither dared to say a word.

"Frost, did we get the lab results we were waiting for?" Jane asked.

"Not that I know of. I thought you wanted to check on them yourself."

"No, actually, would you mind getting them for me?" She said biting her bottom lip and not lifting her eyes to look Frost.

"Sure." Frost said, shooting a questioning glance at Korsak, who just shrugged. Jane never passed up the chance to go down to the morgue.

Jane couldn´t stay there any longer, she knew the guys could tell something was up, and sooner or later they'd begin asking questions she had no desire to answer. She cursed at herself for not being able to hide her emotions better. "Korsak, I think I need to go home, I don't feel that great. Do you think I could I take a couple of days off?" If their little encounter at the coffee shop this morning was any indication of how things were going to go between Maura and her, she needed more time to figure things out. She couldn't face her right now.

"Uh sure Jane, are you going to be ok? Do you feel sick?" Korsak asked worried. Jane never asked for time off.

"I'll be fine. Must be a bug or something." She shrugged getting up to leave.

"Ok, feel better Jane."

A few minutes later Frost came back upstairs along with Maura, who was holding a folder and wanted to discuss something about the report with Jane.

"Where did Jane go?" Frost asked.

"She went home. She said she wasn't feeling great and asked for a couple of days off."

"Jane took a couple of days off? Maura said, surprised.

"Maybe she just needed a little break Doc." Korsak replied.

"Vince, she never takes days off! You know that." Maura just turned and went downstairs to grab her things; she made sure everything was covered at work and headed to Jane's apartment.

Once she was there, she hesitated for a minute. Jane had been pushing her away lately, and as much as she hated it, she knew that Jane didn't do well when she was pushed. But at the same time she knew something important had to be bothering her to take time off from work, and she couldn't just step back and do nothing. She tried to come up with some theories. Was Jane upset with her? She didn't seem upset the other night, except about the nightmare. But then she had left so suddenly and without an apparent reason. This is why she liked dealing with dead people better. Maura sighed and headed up to Jane's apartment.

"Jane! Open the door Jane," she called out banging quite loudly on Jane's front door.

"What are you doing here, Maura?" Jane asked as she opened the door, looking confused.

"What do you mean what am I doing here. You asked for days off! What is wrong Jane? And please don´t say nothing, I´m not stupid, you know." Maura said, irritation clear on her voice.

"Nothing is wrong! Why can´t you just leave me alone!" Jane replied sharply.

"Really? Leave you alone? I may not have much experience in friendships, but I´m certain best friends don´t leave each other _alone_ when one of them is not doing well." Maura spat back.

"Who said I wasn't doing well? Please just leave, Maura." Jane held the door open waiting for Maura to leave.

"Jane, what did I do wrong? Please tell me so I can fix it." Maura was getting teary eyed, and Jane couldn´t handle a crying Maura, especially not now.

"Nothing! God Maura, you can be really annoying at times. Just go home ok?" Jane needed to get Maura to leave before she couldn't hold it together any longer.

Maura crossed the door to leave, her back towards Jane, and paused for a second. "Maura, wait," Jane called out softly, feeling guilty about the way she had just talked to the honey blonde. Maura turned around to see Jane's eyes glassy with unshed tears. "I'm so sorry Maura, for taking this all out on you…. It's not your fault…" She said, her voice strained.

Maura moved close and held her friend tightly as she let out one choked sob. Jane felt like she could get lost in her embrace, it felt so good, so right. But she willed herself to pull back, trying to compose herself. Maura could see the brunette struggling with whatever was bothering her; she could see the pain in her eyes.

"What can I do, Jane?" The Medical Examiner asked hopeful, wanting to do whatever it took to help her best friend.

"Nothing…" she said, unable to meet the doctor's eyes.

"Do you really want me to leave?" Maura asked with uncertainty.

_No, please don't leave, I need you so much, I want you…_ "Yes…" She replied, her eyes screaming for Maura to stay_._

"Will you call me if you need me?"

Jane just shook her head. _I always need you…_

Maura headed out, wiping away her tears, trying to understand what had just happened. Her heart hurt for her friend, and she wished Jane had asked her to stay so badly.

On the other side of the door Jane had her back against it and slid to the floor wrapping her arms around her knees and burying her face on her arms crying. _I'm so sorry Maura…_

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Let me know what you think? Reviews make me happy! :)

AN: Thanks so much for all the reviews, favorites and follows I am completely amazed at the response!


	4. Chapter 4

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 4**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary,** I don't have enough words to thank you for everything you do. I just couldn't do this without you at all. You are absolutely the bestest (you said it's a word so!) :P Credit goes to her for some amazing additions to the chapter as well as suggestions. :)

**A/N2: **So I feel the need to "defend" Jane a little, because I obviously really love her character, it's reason why this fiction is mainly written from her POV. I don't think she's just being annoying. From experience (that did not end how we all want Rizzles to end), telling a good friend and in this case best friend, that you have feelings for them, is far from easy. So I can´t see Jane realizing she has feelings and going "Oh, I'll go tell Maura" right away. But don't worry; _something_ is going to happen soon enough! Thanks for all your support! :)

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**_Hold My Heart_**_ (Sara Bareilles)_

_Does anybody know how to hold my heart  
How to hold my heart?  
'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go too soon_

_I want to tell you so before the sun goes dark_  
_How to hold my heart_  
_'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go of you_

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Three days had passed since Jane had left work, and still she wasn't back. Everyone had called her but she wasn't answering her phone. What was the point anyway, she hated when people asked her if she was ok, especially when she was obviously not. She had only answered a couple of messages so that they wouldn't show up at her place pounding on her door.

She didn't get any texts or calls from Maura though… the one person she needed the most and at the same time dreaded seeing again. She knew she couldn't keep avoiding her forever; she had to talk to her friend, but that thought was more terrifying that dealing with any criminal.

"Hey Frankie, how's Jane doing?" Korsak asked, looking up from the papers on his desk, uncertainty playing across his features.

"What do you mean how is she doing? I haven't seen her, I've been busy. She hasn't been here?" Frankie replied, confused.

"Not since Monday, she left because she said she wasn't feeling well. She didn't answer her phone but sent me a message saying she still wasn't feeling great."

"My sister is at home sick for three days? That's so not Jane; I'm going over to her place." He said over his shoulder as he left the precinct.

He got to Jane's apartment in a record time and ran up to her door. "Jane? Janie open up!" He called out loudly.

"I don't care what you want Frankie. Just go away!" She called from behind the closed door.

"Jane, open the door or I swear I'll break it." He threatened.

"What is it?" She yelled at him, yanking the door open and walking away from him. "Can't I take a couple of days off without you coming here and threatening to break down my door?"

"No, you never take days off Jane."

"Well, maybe I should!" _God, what was up with everybody!_

"Jane, you have been home since Monday. You never call out sick. Care to tell me what's going on?" He asked, with concern in his voice.

"No. Leave me alone." She said quietly, not meeting her brothers' gaze.

"I'm not going away until you tell me what's going on." Stubbornness was clearly a Rizzoli trait.

There it was again, that tightness in her chest that wouldn't leave her and made it hard to breath. That stinging in her eyes that was becoming too common lately. She was strong; she wouldn't let her little brother see her as weak.

"Frankie, please…" She begged.

Frankie knew his sister was uncomfortable with hugs (except when it came to Maura's, of course), but he could also tell she really needed one right now. So he walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her tightly. "I'm a guy so I suck at this, but you can tell me anything sis, you know that."

Jane just shook her head.

"Have you talked to someone about it at least? To Maura?" He asked.

She just shook her head again, against her brothers' chest.

"You haven't talked to Maura? How come Janie?"

"I can't." She croaked.

"Why can't you talk to Maura? You love Maura."

"That's the problem," was the muffled response.

"What do you mean? Maura is the problem?"

"I _love_ Maura, ok? _That's_ the problem." She said walking away from her brother, unsure of what his reaction would be. Her heart was pounding inside her chest, she couldn't believe she had said that out loud.

"Oh. Oh shit." Were the first words out of his mouth but as soon as he saw Jane's expression, he corrected, "No, no Janie not that I disapprove or anything. I'm sorry, I was just surprised. When did you realize this? I'm guessing she doesn't know anything?"

"I can't tell her. I can´t lose her." She whispered.

"Jane, listen, I've seen the way she looks at you. And I know that you probably think I'm clueless because I'm a guy. But I'm pretty sure she feels the same way."

"No way Frankie. She deserves so much better. Plus she's not attracted to me, she has said so." Jane said, her heart breaking, as she remembered her friends' words.

"Hey listen. Why don't you try to get some rest, I'll stay with you ok? You look like you haven't slept in days sis."

"Ok…" She said, too exhausted to argue.

"Come on, get in bed, and I'll be here when you wake up."

After her admission to Frankie, the fight had gone out of her. She sank down onto the bed, let her brother cover her up, and buried her face in her pillow. She didn't even have time to fully understand what she'd just done, what she'd just said, before sleep overcame her.

A few hours later, while Frankie was sitting on the couch watching something on tv, he heard a piercing scream coming from his sister's room and hurried to check up on her. He found her sitting in bed soaked in sweat and breathing heavily. "God, no, no, no, fuck!" Jane mumbled shaking, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Sis, hey calm down, you're ok." He said as he sat next to her, holding her hand.

She looked up at Frankie terrified. "Maura," she whispered. "Frankie, you need to call her. I need to know that she's safe. Please."

"Ok Janie, I'll call her, try to calm down ok?"

Jane looked at him, biting her lip while he waited for what seemed like forever, for Maura to answer. "She's not answering sis."

"Call Korsak." She said, barely able to contain her panic.

Her brother was already dialing the number.

"Hey Korsak. Yeah I'm with her right now. Listen, do you know if Maura's there now? She didn't show up today? Did you try calling her? Ok, yeah I'll call you back." He hung up and Jane was already up and ready to go.

"We need to find her Frankie. I keep dreaming that she's hurt…" She said, the lump in her throat cutting her off.

"Jane, I'm sure she's fine. Come on let's go, I'm driving."

When they got to Maura's house, Frankie broke the door open, and they searched the house with their guns drawn.

"Maura!" Jane called out but there was no answer.

They searched the place from top to bottom but there was no sign of Maura. Jane opened Maura's bedroom door and gasped. She saw the small round table by the window turned over, Maura's purse on the floor, its contents spread all over the place. These were all clear signs of struggle. "Oh God no, please tell me this is a nightmare!" she said horrified, as she sank down to the floor holding her head in her hands.

Frankie pulled out his phone to call Korsak, once again.

While he was on the phone, Jane heard Maura's cell ringing. She shuffled through the things on the floor looking for it desperately. "Hello?" She tried to keep her voice from wavering.

"Hello Detective." The unknown voice replied.

"Who are you. Where's Maura. What do you want!" The words came rushing out of her mouth. There was no way she could keep calm; this was her worst nightmare coming true.

"Don't be impatient Detective. I need you, as well as Doctor Isles." The man said calmly.

"Let me talk to Maura. Is she ok?" She pleaded.

"You don't give me orders, Detective. There's a paper on the night table with directions. Follow them and you'll find us. You better come alone." He finished.

"Jane no!" She heard Maura scream in the background as the line went dead. "Oh God, Maura…" Jane covered her mouth with her hands shocked, tears threatening to fall. She forced herself out of the terrified daze she was in, and ran downstairs.

Frankie was still on the phone, when Jane rushed by him. She grabbed the car keys and ran out to the car. He couldn't catch up with her and Jane was gone before he could even ask anything. "Damnit!" Frankie cursed. "Korsak, Jane´s gone too!"

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Let me know what you think? Reviews make me really really happy! :)

AN: Thanks so much for all the reviews, favorites and follows I am completely amazed at the response!


	5. Chapter 5

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 5**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary**, I don't have enough words to thank you for everything you do. You are amazing. Again, so much credit to you, for letting me use your brilliant ideas! :)

**A/N2: **I'm going away for a week to a place in the middle of nowhere, so I won't have internet connection *hides* But I'll update ASAP when I get back.

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**When the world stops spinning**

(Kyler England)

_I will let you go  
When the world stops spinning  
I will let you go  
When the world stops spinning  
I will let you go  
When the sun and the stars explode  
And the world stops spinning_

_When the terra ﬁrma quakes_  
_When the oceans tidal wave_  
_I would rather die_  
_Than to ever say goodbye_  
_To you my love, to you my love_

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Jane was driving as fast as she could, one hand on the wheel, fingers tapping nervously, and the other frantically trying to figure out the map. It seemed like the place was right outside of Boston. She could only guess it was farmland.

After 30 minutes of driving, the 30 longest minutes of agonizing terror she had ever experienced, with every possible scenario passing through her mind, she finally got to her destination.

She fumbled with the seat belt, tripping over her feet as she stumbled out of the car. There was a light in one of the windows of the small country house and she hurried towards it.

She cracked the door open, her heart thudding so loudly she was sure she would be caught. But she scanned the place, saw nothing and pushed forward.

She searched the different rooms, pausing on each threshold to prepare herself for what she might see in there.

Finally, finally, she saw Maura.

Maura.

She was handcuffed to a chair.

Jane hurried to her, relief washing over her, knowing that Maura was still alive.

Jane kneeled next to Maura, startling her. "Maur…" she whispered, "we need to get you out of here." Jane brushed her fingers across Maura's face, as if trying to convince herself that the honey blonde was ok.

Maura looked at her, with a tear streaked face. "Jane…. you need to leave, now." She said urgently.

"I'm not leaving you…" Jane replied, searching her pocket with shaking hands. She finally found her keys and started undoing the cuffs to free Maura.

"Welcome Detective!" A man she couldn't place said. He was staring at them, grinning and with his arms crossed over his chest

They both jumped at the sound of the man's voice. Jane moved protectively in front of Maura.

"Aw how sweet, the good Detective always to the rescue."

"What do you want?" Jane said through gritted teeth.

"I want revenge of course." His eerie laugh caused Jane to get goose bumps.

"I don't even know who you are. Let her go." Jane said. "You can do whatever you want with me, but please, let her go."

"I can't believe you don't remember me, Detective. You are really quite a hero, aren't you? Too bad it won't work this time."

He pulled his gun out and aimed it at Maura with a cocky smile on his face.

Everything seemed to go in slow motion from then on. Jane pulled out her gun; the only thing that mattered to her was keeping Maura safe. Without giving it a second thought, she pushed Maura with her body to get her out of the line of fire. If it was the last thing she got to do, she would keep Maura safe.

Maura was shocked for a split second to find herself on the floor, when she realized what was about to happen. She didn't have time to react as two shots were heard echoing in the empty house. For a few seconds everything went silent. Maura recovered quickly and looked up to see Jane unmoving on the floor. She crawled over to her, terror almost paralyzing her.

"Jane!" She was quickly at her side scanning the place. The man's body was lying a few feet away from them. Maura hoped that he was dead, and concentrated on Jane. "Jane sweetheart, please talk to me, please open your eyes." Maura begged.

She tried to find where the bullet had hit Jane, in the darkness of the abandoned house. It was her upper chest, towards her right shoulder. Maura applied pressure to the wound attempting to stop the bleeding, while all the possible trajectories that bullet could have taken went through her mind. Then she searched for Jane's phone, luckily she had it with her, so she grabbed it and called Korsak.

"Korsak, Jane's been shot. Do you have our location?" She asked desperately.

"Yes, Frost has been tracking Jane's phone, we are almost there. I'll call 911. Is she hurt badly?"

"Yes. Please hurry up!" Maura was panicking now. _Not again, please not again…_

Jane groaned in pain and her eyes fluttered open. "M-maur…"

"Jane. Sweetheart please don't talk, you were shot. The ambulance is on its way. You're going to be ok." Maura's voice was shaking.

Jane kept trying to talk. "A-re… y-you… o-kk?" She asked through ragged breaths.

"I'm fine. Please don't talk Jane…" The Medical Examiner pleaded.

"I.. c-can´t breathe M-maur…" Jane said wheezing.

"Yes, yes you can. Jane please try for me, try to take shallow breaths. You can do it, you're going to be ok…" Maura said in tears, trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

She had been in the same situation before; trying to stop Jane from bleeding out with her own hands. She thought back to the time Jane had shot through herself, Maura was sure she would lose her then. There had been so much blood and her attempt to stop it seemed futile. This felt like a repeat of that horrifying time. Tears were falling freely from her eyes.

"M-maur….p-please… don't cry. I'm s-sorry. I l-love…. y-you…." Jane managed to get out somehow, before giving in to the darkness.

"I love you too Jane. Jane? Please, please don't leave me… I need you, please!" Maura was sobbing holding Jane close to her and still trying to apply pressure to the wound. There was nothing else she could do to help her friend, she felt so useless. What good did it do for her to be a doctor, if she couldn't keep the most important person in her life from dying?

A few minutes later, Korsak and Frost came in yelling "Freeze, police!" as they didn't know who would be in there. As soon as they walked in the room, the scene before their eyes seemed surreal. An apparently dead, unknown man was lying a few feet away from Maura, who was sobbing while holding a bleeding and unconscious Jane.

Frost checked on the man and said, "He's dead." They both hurried over to Jane and Maura, kneeling next to them.

"Doc! What happened? Are you ok? " Korsak asked, concern reflected in his expression.

Maura couldn't get a word out, she just nodded, still holding Jane close to her.

The paramedics came rushing in and Maura wouldn't let them pull her away from Jane.

"Doc, let them help her." Korsak said trying to pull Maura away.

"No! I need to be with her. I'll let them work, just please; I need to be with her." She said, her voice etched with fear.

They moved Jane to the gurney and into the ambulance, and Maura managed to convince them to let her ride with Jane. "We'll be right behind you." Korsak said.

On the ride to the hospital they tried to stabilize Jane, she would need surgery as soon as she was stable enough. She had an IV in her hand, an oxygen mask and was hooked up to many monitors that Maura knew all too well. Each drip of the IV, each hiss of the oxygen and beep of the monitors telling her that Jane was still alive. All Maura dared to do was hold Jane's fingers so she would know she was with her. She couldn't stop her tears as she gently brushed a strand of Jane's hair whispering "I love you Jane, please don't leave me".

As soon as they got to the hospital, Jane was rushed to the ER and taken away from Maura. Maura felt so helpless and scared… She was pale as a ghost, her eyes not really focusing on anything, as if she was somewhere else. Korsak and Frost arrived a minute later. Korsak wrapped his arm around Maura, who looked like she was about to pass out.

"Come sit down Doc." He said, guiding her to a chair.

Maura was in a daze and wasn't responding to anything. She didn't even acknowledge that the two detectives were there. Once again, she was covered in Jane's blood. How many times would Jane be able to pull through something like this?

"Are you hurt? Maybe they should check you over." Korsak said, worrying about the Medical Examiner.

"I'm fine." Maura answered in a monotone.

"Can you tell us what happened?"

"I… not right now…" Words escaped her, as her only thought was Jane, who was hurt again. Protecting her, again.

Jane's family arrived; Angela was crying and asking where her baby was. They explained briefly what had happened, even though they weren't sure about all the details.

A Doctor walked to the waiting room a few moments later. "Jane Rizzoli's family?" They all got up, except for Maura, she couldn't make herself move.

"Yes, she's my baby, how is she, Doctor?" Angela said.

"She has a gunshot wound to her upper chest, we managed to stabilize her, but she needs surgery, she's lost a lot of blood and the bullet perforated her lung. She's strong and healthy though. We will do everything we can." With that he left them, everyone looking terrified.

When Angela noticed Maura sitting down, looking so lost, her heart broke even more. "Honey? Come with me, let's get you washed up and changed ok?" Maura just nodded without looking at her. Korsak helped her get up and Angela put her arm around her guiding her to the bathroom. Minutes later, they came out; Maura wearing a set of scrubs Angela had borrowed from a nurse. It didn't help fill the time, only cut away a few minutes of the seemingly never ending wait for the Doctor. They all just sat in silence waiting for news from him.

They had been waiting for over three hours and Maura hadn't said one word. Finally the doctor came out to talk to them.

"Jane is in a critical state, but she is stable. We were able to remove the bullet, and stop the bleeding, but she lost a lot of blood and she's very weak. We repaired her lung, but we had to put a tube in to make sure she can breathe. The next 48 hours are crucial."

"Can we see her?" Angela asked.

"In a few minutes. She is still unconscious; she probably will be for a while. I'll come out and let you know when you can see her."

Everybody was relieved by the news; Frost and Korsak gave a loud sigh of relief, Angela hugged Frankie and Maura finally let herself cry. Angela held her tightly while she sobbed, managing to get a few words out, "I'm so sorry… it's my fault, it's my fault."

"Honey it's wasn't your fault. Shhh, Jane will be ok, she's strong, you know that." Angela reassured her.

When the doctor came back to tell them, they could see Jane for a few minutes, one at a time, Angela went first, then Frankie, Korsak and Frost. Every single one came out of the room with tears in their eyes. Maura insisted on going in last; she knew that once she saw Jane, she wouldn't be able to leave her side.

Maura paused for a minute outside the door; she had to brace herself for the sight that was waiting for her. Seeing Jane looking so fragile and hooked up to all those machines was something she would never get used to. When she finally walked in, she had tears of relief and concern running down her cheeks. The strong detective looked so small in that hospital bed, she looked so pale, even compared to the white hospital sheets. Maura pulled up a chair to sit next to Jane, holding her hand softly.

She looked at the brunette, wondering how she always came to save her, to save everybody. She forced herself to say something, since she knew that it was likely that Jane could hear her. "Hi Jane. I know you are going to be ok, because you are the strongest person I know. Thank you for saving my life… again. I just wish you didn't need to do it so often. I'm not going anywhere, I'll be right here when you wake up. The nurses will have to physically drag me out if they want me to leave." Maura had to stop, the lump in her throat preventing her from talking anymore.

She held Jane's hand softly, stroking it lightly with her thumb. She didn´t move from her position all night. Nothing else mattered but Jane, her entire world was focused on the beautiful sleeping face in front of her. Her eyes shifted between Jane and the machines, making sure everything seemed to be under control. She refused to take her eyes off of her friend for longer than a few seconds, afraid that something would happen if she did.

In the morning the doctor came in to check up on Jane and informed Maura that he was going to remove the breathing tube, and see how Jane would do with just an oxygen mask. Everything went fine and Jane was breathing on her own now, though her oxygen levels were a little low. The doctor said it was normal and that Jane was doing well, considering everything.

A few hours later, Maura heard a soft moan, and she turned to look at Jane. She seemed to be trying to wake up, her face was twitching and her breathing had changed.

"Jane, it's Maura. Can you hear me?" Maura said softly while still holding Jane´s hand.

Jane's eyes fluttered open just to close again a couple of times, until she finally seemed to be able to focus with difficulty.

"M-maur..?" She said, barely a whisper.

"I'm here Jane. You're at the hospital; please try not to move much." Maura was so relieved to see those beautiful brown eyes open again.

"W-what…?"

"You were shot… upper chest towards your right shoulder. You'll be ok Jane. Are you in a lot of pain?"

Jane just shook her head. She was in a good amount of pain but she didn't want to be all drugged up. She couldn't take her eyes off of Maura's perfect face, those beautiful hazel eyes and silky honey blonde hair. She had been sure she'd never see her again. But that would be ok, as long as Maura was safe.

"Maur… are y-you ok?" Jane managed to get out.

"No."It came out of Maura's lips before she could stop it. But seeing the frown on her friend's face she realized she didn't say the right thing. "I mean, physically, which I'm guessing is what you want to know right now, yes I'm fine Jane."

"Thank God…." Jane closed her eyes with a sigh of relief.

"Jane, you need to get some rest, I'm calling the nurse so that the doctor can come and check up on you." Maura pushed the call button and a nurse came in a couple of minutes later. Maura explained that Jane had woken up and the nurse said she'd call the doctor.

While they were waiting for the doctor, neither one could take their eyes off of each other. Maura ran her hand through Jane's hair and never let go of her hand. There was a whole silent conversation going on between them, just from the look in their eyes.

There was a soft knock on the door, as the Doctor came in about 10 minutes later. "Hi Jane, I'm Doctor Holden. How are you feeling?"

"Been… better."

"You must be in pain, and will be for a while. I'll get you some more pain killers. You need to rest as much as you can, and try not to do any strenuous movements, ok? You lost a good amount of blood, so I don't want you trying to get up yet. I'll be back to check up on you later." With that he left and a nurse came in to give Jane some more medication.

"I don't want to go to sleep Maur…" Jane said groggily. _I don't ever want to lose sight of you again, you're so beautiful and perfect and I'm so thankful that you're alive._

"Shhh it's ok sweetheart, you need to rest. We can talk later, ok?"

"But Maur..." She said not able to keep her eyes open.

"It's ok Jane. I'll be here." Maura kissed her forehead, a tear rolling down her cheek. Jane had been so lucky, again, and Maura was very grateful for that. She couldn't imagine her life without the incredibly stubborn and brave brunette.

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Reviews make me really really happy! :)

AN3: Thanks so much for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 6**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary** thank you sooo much for everything you do. You are amazing. :)

**A/N2:** Sorry about the delay, I just got back from my vacation last night. I was stuck without internet for a week.

* * *

A few hours went by, and Maura never left Jane's side. Jane had been sleeping so peacefully; she had barely moved, and her face looked so relaxed, she had very rarely seen her friend looking like that. Maura could only thank whatever force had kept Jane safe once again.

Maura was deep in thought, when Angela came in the room quietly. "Hi Maura, how's my baby doing?"

"Hi Angela, she's ok. She was awake for a little bit, but they gave her more pain medication and it makes her tired. She should get as much rest as possible."

"Maura, why don't you take a short break, go home, take a nap and get a shower? You look really exhausted honey."

"A shower does sound good. But I don't want to leave her." Maura said, looking at her sleeping friend.

"I figured you'd say that, so I brought some clothes for you to change into." Angela smiled.

"Thank you, Angela." Maura said, taking her clothes and walking in the bathroom to shower and change, with a last glance at Jane before she left.

Angela sat next to Jane while she slept; she was so relieved that her baby was ok. Maura came out of the bathroom after 20 minutes, and told Angela that she'd go get some coffee and food, wanting to give her some time alone with her daughter. Maura wanted to be with Jane more than anything, but she felt she had no right to intrude in Angela's time with her, and as hard as it was, she tried to stay away for a while.

A couple of hours passed and Jane began stirring, and opened her eyes. "Maura?" Jane asked, with a sleepy voice.

"Janie sweetheart, it's your Ma, Maura went to get some coffee and food. She will be back soon. How do you feel?"

"Ma? I need to see Maura…." Jane started to get really worked up.

"Janie, Maura is ok, the man that was after both of you is dead. She's ok honey." Angela said calmly.

"Ma please! I need to see her!" Jane was getting increasingly agitated, her breathing becoming labored and the heart monitor started beeping loudly in the room.

"Ok honey, please calm down, I'll go find Maura ok? But please calm down you're going to hurt yourself." Angela rushed out the door, and Maura was waiting right there.

"Maura, thank God you're here! Jane is getting really worked up, she says she needs to see you. I'm going to get a nurse."

Maura panicked and was inside the room and next to Jane in a split second.

"Jane… sweetheart, please calm down." She said quietly, attempting to hide her concern. Jane's face showed an incredible amount of relief to see her.

"Maur… you're safe." Jane's eyes lit up and she started to calm down, though she was having trouble catching her breath.

"I'm ok, I promise. Try to take shallow breaths Jane." She said, holding her hand.

Jane coughed and winced as pain radiated from her upper chest to the rest of her body.

"Please, you need to try to relax."

Angela walked in the room with a nurse, who was wondering what all the commotion was about. "What's going on in here?"

"She just got a little agitated, she's calming down now." Maura explained.

"Ok. But she needs to stay calm or I'll have to sedate her." The nurse stated. She checked Jane's vitals and then headed out.

Maura nodded and Jane finally started to relax, feeling completely drained from the quick burst of panic and rush of activity, and closed her eyes.

"I'm going to update everybody. Try to relax Janie." Angela said, kissing her daughter on the forehead and leaving the two women alone.

Maura sat next to Jane again, while Jane tried to get her breathing back under control.

"I'm sorry for leaving Jane, I didn't think you'd wake up so soon. And I thought I should give your mom some time alone with you." Maura said with regret in her eyes.

"No it's ok, I'm sorry I panicked." Jane said through still labored breaths.

"It's ok Jane. Just concentrate on breathing right now, try not to talk ok?" Maura said brushing a strand of dark hair.

"I want this off." Jane mumbled trying to remove the oxygen mask.

"I don't think that's a good idea yet, Jane."

"But Maur… I hate it…" Jane pouted.

"Let's wait until the Doctor sees you today, and ask him what he thinks, ok?" _You are so hard to resist with that adorable pouting look on your face. Actually, you are always hard to resist._

"I trust you more than any Doctor."

Maura smiled at her, that room brightening, dimple faced smile that made her weak in the knees.

Speaking of the devil, the doctor knocked and came in the room.

"I heard that my patient got a bit worked up?" he asked.

"I'm ok, Doc. Can I take this off?" Jane asked pointing to the oxygen mask.

"Let me check your oxygen levels." He checked her chart, fiddled with the machines and continued. "Hmm they are not too bad, but not great either. I'll make a deal with you. How about we replace it by an oxygen cannula?"

"Those tube things?" Jane asked.

"Yeah. It should be less uncomfortable, and it will still help you. What do you say?"

"Ok you got a deal, Doc." Jane smiled weakly.

"I'll have the nurse get you one. You are progressing really well Jane, but you need to remain calm ok? Your lung suffered a trauma and it might be hard for you to catch your breath if you overdo things."

Jane nodded.

"Are you in a lot of pain?"

"Not too bad… I don't want painkillers, Doc."

"Ok, as long as you remain calm and you promise to let me know if it becomes too much. I'll be back to check up on you later." He said, and left the room.

A nurse came in shortly after and replaced the oxygen mask by the cannula (or tube thing, as Jane called it). Jane felt much better without having something covering half of her face.

Soon they were alone again, and Maura resumed her position next to Jane, holding her hand and rubbing soft circles across her fingers. Brown eyes met hazel in a look that expressed so much more than any words could.

"You really scared me, Jane." Maura said, breaking the silence.

"You scared me too. I'm so sorry Maura, I should have been with you, I should have protected you." Jane said, with glassy eyes.

"Jane, you did protect me. You saved my life…" Maura couldn't stop her tears from falling. "You really need to stop taking bullets for everyone… you safety is important too. It's important to me. I was so scared that I would lose you…"

"Maur, you're not everyone, and I'd take a bullet for you every single time if it means you'll be safe."

"Jane," Maura paused unsure about saying anything. "After you were shot…. you said…"

"I said… I love you." Jane stated, without breaking eye contact with Maura's beautiful hazel eyes.

Maura was surprised that Jane remembered anything at all. She was sure she wouldn't remember much of what happened after she was shot.

"You meant it as _I love you because you are my best friend_, correct?" She asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"No. I meant it as _I'm completely in love with you and I can't live without you, _Maura. I realize my timing sucked, I'm sorry. But I couldn't stand the thought of… dying… and you never knowing how much I love you."

"Jane…"

"Please don't…. I know that you don't feel the same way and it's ok. I just needed you to know." She was fighting back tears and Maura could see the emotional turmoil her friend was in.

"Jane, how do you know I don't feel the same way?"

"You have said before that you're not attracted to me. You can't lie Maur." Jane had to look away from Maura; physically feeling like her heart was shattering into a million pieces.

"I never actually said that I wasn't attracted to you. I said you are not my type, which you aren't really."

Jane looked like she was going to be sick, so Maura hurried and proceeded.

"Jane, you may not be my type, but I'm in love with you… I have been for a very long time." She said, gently cupping Jane's face, and guiding her to look at her.

"W-what? But…" Jane stuttered, tears running down her cheeks despite her best efforts. Maura leaned over and brushed her lips softly over Jane's.

"I'm completely in love with you, Jane." Jane was speechless and paralyzed. How could this be happening? Maura brushed her fingers along Jane's face wiping a few tears away. "I love you." Maura repeated, hoping the words would sink in.

"I…. I… For how long?" Jane barely managed to get out.

"It feels like forever, Jane. I have loved you since that night when I fixed your nose. I remember thinking I had never seen anyone so beautiful and incredibly brave. I never thought you could feel the same way about me, you know I never had a friend before, and your friendship is so important to me that I never wanted to risk it…" Maura finished, staring at her hands. She felt so guilty for keeping her feelings buried for so long.

Seeing the look on Maura's face, Jane knew she had to snap out of it.

"Maur… how could _anyone_ not love you? You're the most beautiful, intelligent, incredibly sexy and adorably quirky woman I've ever met." Jane smiled at her.

Maura smiled back and leaned over one more time, kissing Jane gently, yet clearly conveying all the feelings she had for the beautiful brunette. The heart monitor made a loud beeping noise and Maura pulled back.

"Stupid heart monitor," Jane mumbled, rolling her eyes.

Maura couldn't help but laugh at that comment. That laugh that came deep down her belly and was absolutely intoxicating. They couldn't take their eyes off each other; it felt like a magnetic force.

"Maur, am I dreaming? Please tell me this is real." Jane bit her bottom lip, all of a sudden things seemed too surreal to her.

"I sure hope you're not. But if you are, then so am I, and I don't want to ever wake up."

Neither could remember feeling this happy, ever. Jane didn't even care that she was at the hospital; this was by far the best moment of her life.

"Maur, you need to get some rest. You've been here for I'm not even sure how long. Why don't you come up here with me and sleep for a while?" Jane said, noticing how tired the beautiful honey blonde looked.

"Jane, I could hurt you, I…"

"Maur come on, you won't. Just lie on my left side, it'll be ok. Please?" Jane begged.

There it was; that irresistible look that Maura couldn't decline. She carefully lay next to Jane on top of the bed covers, cuddling close to her but making sure she wasn't hurting her. Their fingers intertwined, and after just a few minutes, Jane could feel Maura relaxing and her breathing evening out.

Jane smiled to herself; she was having trouble believing this was really happening. She was scared of going to sleep and waking up realizing this had all been a dream. The feeling of having the beautiful woman lying so close to her, was the best feeling in the whole world. Nothing could compare to it.

A few minutes later, Angela walked in the room and saw the moving scene. Maura lying on her side with her arm wrapped lightly around Jane's stomach, their hands laced together, and Jane looking at Maura like she was the most precious thing she had ever seen. When Jane saw her, she quickly made a shushing gesture with her finger.

"Hi Ma, Maura is sleeping, I don't want to wake her up she's exhausted." She whispered.

"I know honey, she wouldn't leave you. She loves you, you know?"

"I know Ma. I love her too." Jane admitted, feeling so relieved.

"It was about time you realized it Janie." Angela smiled at her daughter.

"Ma, really?" Jane said attempting to look annoyed at her mother, but failing and smiling instead.

"Get some rest honey. I'll be back in a little bit. I love you."

"Love you too, Ma."

When Angela left, the long day finally caught up with Jane. She drifted off with a smile on her face, knowing that the beautiful woman lying next to her loved her back.

* * *

Reviews are the best inspiration! :)

A/N3: Thank you all so much for reading, reviewing etc!


	7. Chapter 7

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 7**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary** thanks for your encouragement, support and inspiration _always_. I couldn't do this without you. You are beyond incredible. :)

**A/N2:** Sorry for the delay, I had a bit of trouble putting this chapter together. I hope you guys like it.

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The night went by uneventfully. Jane and Maura both slept through it, oblivious to the rest of the world and everything bad that had happened. They had each other, and that was all that mattered.

Jane was the first to wake up next morning. As she opened her eyes, the first thing that she noticed was the weight across her stomach. When she glanced down and saw Maura's arm wrapped protectively around her, and Maura still asleep next to her, all the events of the previous night came flooding back. A huge smile spread over Jane's face as she admired the gorgeous woman sleeping next to her. The love that she had for the honey blonde was beyond anything she could have ever imagined. She never thought love like that even existed, much less that it would happen to her. Just the thought of Maura brought butterflies to her stomach, made her weak in the knees, and all of those other love clichés she had heard through her life, but never believed were real. Maura made it all real to her.

While Jane was lost in her thoughts, Maura started stirring and finally opened her eyes to meet Jane's, watching her with adoration.

"Hi sleepyhead." Jane smiled at her.

"Jane. Oh my God, how long have I been sleeping for? Are you ok?" She asked, her voice distressed at having lost all track of time.

"It's ok, you needed it. I'm ok Maur, relax. Can I have a good morning kiss?" She said with a grin Maura had missed.

"You think you can handle it, Detective?" Maura dared, raising one eyebrow.

"Try me."

Maura leaned over cupping Jane's face tenderly with one hand. She moved close to the brunette, gazing lovingly into her eyes and grazed her lips over Jane's gently. Jane parted her lips allowing Maura to deepen the kiss, tongues meeting and slowly exploring, tasting what they had only dreamed of. The feeling was exhilarating and both women got lost in the sensations that were consuming them, never wanting for it to end.

It took every ounce of self control Maura had to make herself to pull back, concerned about her friend's health. Jane's eyes were still closed not wanting to let go of the feeling of Maura's lips against hers, her tongue softly tracing her lips, her warmth, her taste.

"Jane?" Maura asked, with a concerned tone.

Jane opened her eyes slowly, looking into hazel eyes with a smile that lit her whole face.

"I love you so much, Maura Isles." Jane whispered.

"I love you too, Jane. Are you feeling ok?"

"Never been better." The grin wouldn't leave her face.

"Jane, I'm serious." Maura sat up and got off the bed, her brows furrowed. "You need to rest."

"But I _am_ resting" Jane whined, with a smile that made Maura melt instantly.

"You think punching a dummy is restful, Jane." Maura shook her head. Sometimes it was really difficult for her to understand the tough yet adorable Detective.

Jane laughed, regretting it immediately as pain shot through her upper chest.

"Ow." She grimaced.

"Jane…"

"I'm ok, Maur. Just remind me not to laugh yet."

"Do you ever listen to me?"

"Sometimes I do… Maur… I really want to go home." Jane's lips formed the most precious pout. She really hated hospitals.

"Jane, I'm sure you'll be able to leave soon. But you know you won't be able to go home by yourself; you're going to need assistance for a while." Maura said, carefully. She knew how much the brunette hated to feel helpless and having to depend on others.

"No I won't, I'll be fine!" Jane's defenses shot up, she couldn't help it.

"Jane, please let me take care of you. Would you stay with me?"

"No way Maura, my mother will be up my a… butt 24/7. I'm staying at my place." She said, stubbornly, almost childishly.

"Alright, then I'm staying with you." Maura said, arms crossed around her chest.

"You really don't have to."

"I know I don't have to. I want to Jane. And I think the doctor may be more inclined to let you go home sooner, if he knows you'll have someone taking care of you. Would you rather have Angela stay with you?"

"Ok I'm sold." She replied with a smirk.

There was a knock on the door and Maura called, "Come in."

Frost and Korsak walked in the room, smiling as they saw the improvement in Jane's condition.

"Hey Jane!" Korsak bumped awkwardly into the bed rail.

"Hey partner! Hey Doc." Frost greeted cheerfully.

"Frost, Korsak! It's so good to see you guys." Jane had really missed them.

"It's so good to see you doing better." Korsak said. "Hey Doc."

"Hello Vince, Frost. I should probably give you some time alone with them, Jane."

"No Maur, stay, please."

"Ok, if you're sure." Maura moved back and sat on the couch, giving them a little privacy.

"I didn't get a chance to thank you both for finding us." Jane frowned, her thoughts drifting back to what had happened in that small farmhouse. She shuddered at the image of finding Maura handcuffed to a chair and at the very real possibility that she could have gotten badly hurt.

"Don't even mention it. We are just relieved to know that you'll be ok. Will you ever learn not to run off on your own?" Korsak asked, knowing all too well what the answer would be.

"I can't promise I won't if Maura is ever in danger…."

Korsak just shook his head. Jane would never change; she'd always put everyone's safety before her own.

"Did you guys find out who was the guy?" Jane wondered. She hadn't had the chance to ask anything about the man who took Maura.

"Yeah. Remember that case where you and Dr. Isles put away that man who had murdered 3 women? Brian Randall. Well this guy was his brother. He must have wanted revenge."

"Oh God. Is the brother still in prison?" Jane asked, on the verge of panic.

"Yeah, he is. It's over, Jane." Korsak reassured her.

"Yeah this time… What about the next person who wants revenge. I don't want Maura to be involved in this kind of stuff." Jane ran her hand through her hair, her chest tightening.

"Jane… it's my job too, you can't help that." Maura interrupted.

"Jane, try not to get worked up over this right now, ok?" Korsak said, placing a reassuring hand on Jane's shoulder.

"Yeah partner. Try to get some rest, you'll be out of here in no time."

"Thanks. I can't wait."

"Take care, we'll see you soon." Frost said, as the two men headed out the door.

Maura went over and held Jane's hand. "Hey…"

"Hey." Jane attempted a smile, but failed.

"Try not to get agitated Jane. It's not good, especially right now."

"I know, I'm fine Maur. Thanks. I just can't stand the thought of anything happening to you. I don´t know what I would do…" Jane trailed off.

Another knock on the door interrupted them, and Frankie walked in. Maura moved away from Jane's side, allowing the siblings some space.

"Frankie!" Jane's face lit up again. She had missed her little brother.

"Hey sis! Hey Maura." Frankie was so glad to see his sister doing better.

"Hi Frankie." Maura replied. She loved watching Jane and Frankie interact; she never knew what having a sibling was like, but watching them warmed her heart.

"Can I hug you, Janie? I don't want to hurt you." Frankie asked.

"Get your butt over here and give me a hug!"

"I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner sis." He leaned over and hugged his sister carefully.

"It's ok. Ma said you've had a bunch of long shifts."

Frankie sat next to her and held her hand. "Janie… don't ever leave on your own like that again. Please. I was so scared." He said seriously.

"I'm sorry Frankie. I wasn't thinking clearly. All I knew is that I had to get to Maura…"

"I know sis. Everything is ok right now. So don't worry, ok?"

"Yeah. Thanks Frankie. I love you."

"Love you too sis. I gotta go, we were told not to stay too long because you need to rest." He got up and kissed her forehead. "Get better soon so you can go home, ok?"

"That's the plan. Bye Frankie." She smiled.

"Goodbye Frankie." Maura echoed.

Frankie waved as he was leaving, and the Doctor came in the room to check up on Jane.

"Is my patient overdoing things today?" He asked.

"Nah Doc. When can I go home?"

"Let me check your file. Are you in a lot of pain?" He asked, while checking her stats and test results.

"Only when I laugh."

"How about we do this, I'll take off the cannula and if your oxygen levels are ok and you're not in too much pain, I'll release you tomorrow. On the condition that you'll have someone with you at all times, for at least a few more days."

"Really? That sounds great Doc." She replied, her voice laced with exhaustion.

"Ok, let me take that off for you then. You'll have to do some breathing exercises too."

Jane nodded.

"Get some rest now. I hear you've had quite a few visitors today."

"Thank you Doctor. I hope it's ok for me to stay with her tonight." Maura asked.

"Of course Doctor Isles." He smiled, walking out of the room and leaving them alone again. Finally.

Maura walked back to Jane, who was exhausted and had her eyes closed. She held Jane's hand up to her lips, and kissed it lightly. "Get some rest love, I'll be here. Do you need anything?" The term had slipped before Maura registered it.

Jane opened her eyes half way and her lips curved up in a smile. "Just you."

"I never knew you'd be such a romantic."

"You bring it out of me…. Maur, come sleep with me." Jane patted the side of the bed softly.

"Sweetheart, you'll sleep much better without me taking up half of your bed. I'll be fine over there."

"I won't, I sleep much better with you by my side. Please?"

"You have me wrapped around your little finger, you know that right?"

"And you have me wrapped around yours." Jane smiled at her and Maura lay in bed next to her, placing a soft kiss on her lips.

"I love you." Jane mumbled, her eyelids felt so heavy as she tried to keep them open, but finally gave into her body's need for rest.

"I love you too. More than you can imagine, Jane." Maura whispered, as she cuddled next to the woman she loved more than she thought was possible, and she knew Jane loved her back. But they hadn't had the chance to really talk about things. As Jane slept, Maura's mind was in overdrive. She'd never dreamed that Jane would love her back. She felt lucky enough that Jane thought of her as her best friend. But to have Jane love her in the same way she did was more than she could ever hope for. She watched Jane's face as she slept, so perfect and beautiful, and placed her hand over the brunette's heart, the feeling of her heartbeat reassuring her.

Maura saw the door open quietly, and Angela peeked in. Maura was going to get up, but Angela gestured for her to stay.

"Hi honey, don't worry I know Jane needs to rest, just wanted to stop by for a minute and see how she's doing." Angela whispered.

"Hello Angela. She's doing much better; she probably will be allowed to go home tomorrow. I'll stay with her until she's feeling better." Maura replied, feeling a little uncomfortable of having a conversation with Jane's mother, while lying in bed next to her.

"That's good Maura, thank you for taking care of my baby. I'll see you both tomorrow and bring some fresh clothes. You get some rest too honey."

"I will. Thank you Angela."

After Angela left, Maura checked the machines to see how Jane's oxygen levels were doing. She smiled when she realized they were good. Jane would be able to go home the next day. Maura was finally able to relax, and draped her arm around Jane holding her close. Tomorrow would be a busy day getting Jane settled back at home. But they'd be home again. Together. The rhythm of Jane's heartbeat lulled her to sleep, her lips curling up in a smile.

* * *

Reviews are the best inspiration! :)

A/N3: Thank you all so much for reading, reviewing etc! You guys are the best!


	8. Chapter 8

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 8**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary**, just saying thank you doesn't feel like enough anymore. You are the reason why this story is even here, and I don't have the words to say how much everything you do means to me.

* * *

The next morning, Maura was the first to wake up. Her eyes went from the breathtaking sleeping brunette by her side, to the machines, checking that everything was alright. Everything looked good, and Maura was so overcome with happiness that Jane would be released. Lying this close to Jane had an effect on her that was very hard to control.

She didn't want for the nurse to wake Jane up abruptly when she came in, and she figured Jane would be less cranky if she woke her up her way. She placed a tender kiss on Jane's cheek, trailing small kisses along her jaw line and ending with a soft kiss on her lips.

Jane began stirring and her eyes fluttered open.

"Good morning, beautiful." Maura whispered.

"Hey… that was nice. But I must look awful." Jane replied, rubbing her eyes.

"You never do, Jane."

"If it wasn't because you are unable to lie, I'd definitely say you were lying right now." Jane said, squinting her eyes.

"Well, I'm not. You get to go home today." Maura got up from the bed, attempting to straighten up her wrinkled clothes.

"I sure hope so. I can't take much more of this hospital."

A nurse knocked and came in to check up on Jane. "Good morning," she said, "I'm going to check all your stats. If everything is in order, I have Doctor's orders to unhook you from all those machines."

"That would be _awesome_."

The nurse checked over everything, and she was clearly satisfied with how Jane was doing. "Ok, looks like you're ready to go home. I'll free you of all those wires. When I'm done, you should try to sit up for a little bit. Don't get up until the Doctor comes to see you though."

Jane nodded, relieved that she was finally, _finally_ going home. The nurse was done in a couple of minutes, and left them alone.

Maura stood next to Jane, holding her hand. "I'm going to move the back of the bed up a bit, so you start getting used to being in a sitting position. Let me know if it makes you feel nauseous, ok?"

"Sure. I'm just so glad to be free of all those machines, Maur."

Maura moved the bed so that Jane was mostly sitting up. "Are you feeling ok?"

"Good so far."

Maura held Jane's hand and brushed back some dark unruly curls.

"I need a shower so badly." Jane sighed.

"You can take one when we get home, if you feel up to it."

Jane's thoughts were stuck on the words _we_ and _home_. Were they a "we" now? She sure hoped so.

The doctor came in, after not too long, to discharge Jane, and gave her and Maura instructions for her care.

"I'll stay here to help you sit up. I'll have a nurse bring a sling for your right arm; you'll heal faster if you try not to move it much." He stated.

Maura and the Doctor helped Jane sit up completely, her feet dangling off the side of the bed. All the color drained from her face quickly and Maura put her arms around her. "Jane, just breathe, it'll pass."

Jane felt like she was going to pass out any second. All she could see were black and white dots. Her breathing was shallow and her skin felt clammy. Jane attempted to breathe and leaned into Maura's embrace. Maura rubbed soft circles on her back, hoping it would help Jane relax.

"Jane?" The Doctor asked. "Are you doing ok?"

"Just dizzy, it's passing a little though." Jane said, through labored breaths.

"Ok. I'll go fill up your paperwork and give you some time to adjust. A nurse will come by in a few minutes with a wheelchair."

"Thank you Doctor." Maura said. Jane was too busy concentrating on breathing and not passing out to answer.

The Doctor left, and Maura was still holding Jane. "Are you feeling any better, Jane?"

"Little bit. Thanks Maur."

"You don't need to thank me sweetheart. When the nausea starts to fade let me know, so I can help you get dressed." There was something about Jane leaning into her embrace, her too pale face framed by the dark curls, that made Maura ache to take care of her. Even though she knew the Detective didn't really allow anyone to take care of her but Maura, and that made her feel special. Under that tough exterior and all the walls she had built, Jane really just wanted to be loved.

Angela knocked on the door, interrupting Maura's reverie, and came in bringing clean clothes for Jane and Maura. She told them she'd be waiting in the car with Frankie, whenever they were ready.

Maura still had her arms wrapped around Jane. "Do you think you're ready to get dressed?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Ok, then let me help you."

"I can do it." Jane hated feeling weak and having to depend on others.

"Please don't be stubborn. You almost passed out a minute ago. Let me help, Jane."

With a resigned look, Jane just nodded.

"Angela brought comfortable clothes for you, sweatpants and a zip up sweatshirt, so this shouldn't be too hard." Maura carefully helped Jane take off the hospital gown, and slide her arms into the sweatshirt and zipped it up. Next, she helped her into the sweatpants. "You'll need to stand for a minute."

Jane held on to Maura as she stood up a little unsteady, so she could help her with the sweatpants, and sat back on the bed when she was ready. Jane was looking down, her hair falling over her face, and right away Maura knew something was wrong. Maura brought her fingers to Jane's chin, softly lifting her face up until their eyes met. They were full of unshed tears, and it broke Maura's heart.

"Jane…"

"I _hate_ feeling so useless…" Jane said through gritted teeth.

Maura wrapped her arms around her once again, and stroked her hair. "I know sweetheart, you'll be back to your normal self in no time. You just need some time to recover, and I'm happy to be able to help you, Jane." She tenderly wiped a few stray tears running down Jane's face and brushed her lips over Jane's.

A nurse knocked and came in carrying a wheelchair, a sling and a bag with prescriptions. She helped Jane put the sling on and gave Maura the instructions for the medications.

"I don't need the chair." Jane huffed.

"Jane…"

"Fine Maur…" She rolled her eyes, knowing it was pointless to argue.

They both helped Jane into the chair, and the nurse wheeled her to the car, where Frankie was waiting. Frankie helped his sister get in the front seat, and then drove them all to Jane's apartment. On the ride home Jane was quiet. She was glad to finally get out of that hospital, and she knew she had a lot to be grateful for; but she hated feeling so freaking useless.

When they arrived, Frankie helped Jane out of the car, swinging her left arm around his shoulder, and trying to carry most of the weight. Maura fixed some pillows on Jane's bed and helped Frankie lay her sister down.

"Janie, I cooked your favorite lasagna, it's in the fridge if you're hungry later."

"Thanks Ma." Jane said, a little out of breath.

"We'll let you rest now sis. Love you." Frankie waved.

"Love you Janie. Get some rest honey."

Maura thanked them both for everything, and walked them to the door. Once they left, she went back to Jane's room and sat next to her. She leaned over and placed a soft kiss on Jane's forehead, which felt a bit warm. It was to be expected after all the effort she'd done today and all the days she'd gone without moving.

Jane's eyes fluttered open. "I need a shower Maur." She mumbled, tiredly.

"I know Jane. Would you just rest for a minute, and then you can shower?"

"Ok…" She couldn't keep her eyes open as the exhaustion from the morning overtook her body.

Maura watched the brunette as she slept; her features relaxed, looking almost childlike. Maura covered her with a blanket and sat with her for a few minutes, wanting to make sure she would be ok while she took a quick shower. After she was convinced that Jane would be alright for a little while, Maura headed for the bathroom to shower and change.

When she came out of the bathroom, her hair still wet, she went to check up on Jane. She was still sleeping, but she seemed restless. Maura carefully lay down next to her, holding her close. She tenderly brushed her fingers through her hair, attempting to calm her down. It seemed to work and Jane started to relax. For the next two hours Jane slept peacefully, and Maura held her close, her arm wrapped around Jane's waist. Maura still couldn't get over how incredible it felt to have Jane this close to her. Jane was always protecting people; it was her job to be strong, tough. But no one else got to see this side of her; a more vulnerable Jane, who Maura loved to protect and take care of.

When Jane finally started stirring awake, her first feeling was warmth. She felt so safe, an uncommon feeling for her. She opened her eyes and met Maura's, who was holding her and smiling. It was the best possible sight to wake up to.

"Hey. Did I sleep for long?" Jane mumbled sleepily.

"Not too long. How do you feel?"

"Better I think. I really want to take a shower now Maur, I feel gross." Jane made a face.

"Ok, if you think you feel up to it. Let me help you get up, but do it slowly ok?"

Maura helped her up; she still felt a bit weak and unsteady on her feet, but not as dizzy as she had been earlier.

"I'm good Maur."

"Ok, do you need me to help you with anything?"

"No, I think I got it. Thanks."

"Don't worry about getting the bandages wet; I'll change them when you are done."

Jane went into the bathroom, and struggled to get her clothes off. Doing things one handed, even if it was her dominant hand, was not easy. But there was no way she was going to need help doing _everything_. No way. She got in the shower, still a little lightheaded and managed to wash her hair which made her feel so much better. When she was done showering, she got out, and with difficulty dried herself and put her clothes on. She started feeling dizzy again and realized that was as much as she would accomplish on her own. Jane came out of the bathroom with her hair all tangled, and Maura bit her lips trying to suppress a smile. She looked absolutely adorable.

"Hi sweetheart, how are you doing?" Maura asked.

"Feeling much better now. Not completely disgusting."

"Why don't you sit here and let me brush your hair." Maura said, noticing how pale Jane was once again, and patted the bed.

Jane just nodded and sat on the bed, handing her the brush. She closed her eyes as Maura brushed her hair. It felt so nice to feel Maura's hands running through her hair, softly brushing it. It was over too fast for Jane's liking, she could have let Maura do that all day.

"Would you lie down now so I can change the bandages?"

Maura helped Jane lay down, on the opposite side of the bed she usually slept on so that she wouldn't hurt her during the night, and unzipped her sweatshirt just enough so she could dress the wound on her upper chest. Maura couldn't help to notice her tanned skin, her perfect collarbone, her long neck... _Focus Maura._

Maura started dressing Jane's wound, her touch so soft and gentle that it made the brunette shiver. Jane felt like her heart skipped several beats. Her breath hitched and she was convinced that she had completely forgotten to breathe for a few seconds.

"Jane, am I hurting you?" Maura asked, concerned.

"I'm ok." Jane managed to breathe out, closing her eyes. The feeling of Maura's hands on her skin was overwhelming. They were so soft and warm; Jane wanted to feel them all over her body.

"I'm almost done." Maura applied some ointment and put on a new bandage. She brushed her fingers through Jane's damp hair. Maura was about to get up when Jane held on to her arm stopping her.

"Maura…" Jane whispered, her eyes even darker with desire.

Maura had no trouble reading that look. She leaned down lacing her fingers through dark curls and kissed Jane passionately. Jane placed her hand on Maura's hip grazing soft skin with her fingertips, cursing at herself for not being able to use her other arm. She wanted to feel Maura so badly. This kiss wasn't like the other ones they had shared, it was urgent, demanding. Heat ran through their bodies, taking over any conscious thought.

Maura sucked gently on Jane's bottom lip, and pulled back staring into those intense dark eyes. Jane groaned at the loss of contact.

"Jane, we should talk." Maura said, a little out of breath.

"Talking is the last thing on my mind right now. But yeah, I guess we should."

"Yeah, I'm not thinking very clearly right now either." Maura admitted.

"Um ok, well…" Jane paused. She knew they had to do this, the sooner the better. "First I want to apologize for being such a jerk to you, Maur. You didn't deserve it. I freaking suck."

"You don't need to apologize, Jane."

"Of course I do. I… all these feelings hit me like a freight train. Looking back I realize I've felt this way for a very long time, I just didn't let myself see it. And well, when I did realize it, I didn't know how to handle everything, and I did it all wrong. I'm really sorry. I was confused and scared because I didn't want to lose you…" She felt so guilty that she had treated Maura the way she did. Nothing she said could justify that.

"Jane, I should apologize too then, for not saying anything. I've known that I love you for such a long time and I never dared to say anything to you. I mean, how could someone like you, love me? I never thought there was a possibility that you could. You are my best friend, my only friend and I didn't want to jeopardize that." Maura felt equally guilty.

"Maura, why would _you_ love someone like _me_? You could have anyone you want."

"Are you crazy Jane? You're perfect, why would I want anyone else?"

Jane looked puzzled and shook her head. "Maybe that big brain of yours isn't as smart as I thought..."

"Jane, why do you think you're not _exactly_ what I want?"

"Because Maura, just look at you. And look at me..."

"Exactly Jane. Look at yourself, I don't think you can see yourself like everyone else sees you. I wish you could see _you_ through my eyes."

"You deserve so much better than me…" Jane looked miserable.

"Jane, look at me, please."

Jane reluctantly lifted her eyes to meet Maura's.

"Jane, you are everything I could ever want, everything I could ever dream of. You're strong, smart, brave, caring, sweet and absolutely gorgeous and I could go on and on. You let me be myself; you don't try to change me. You bring out the best in me. I'm absolutely and completely in love with you, Jane Rizzoli."

Jane couldn't stop her tears from falling, neither could Maura.

"And even though it beats me why you chose me, I am completely in love with you, Maura Isles."

Maura smiled through her tears. "Good. Now that we have that settled, we can move on to better things."

They both laughed lightly, and Maura held Jane gently. She brushed dark curls behind Jane's ear, and their lips met, with no more doubts or questions between them. They parted for a few seconds, and Maura moved so that she was straddling Jane's lap carefully, her hands on either side of the headboard, hazel eyes reflecting so much passion and desire. She leaned down to kiss Jane's neck softly, leaving a trail of kisses from the base of her neck to her earlobe. Jane brought her hand to the back of Maura's neck, pulling her into a crushing kiss, their need quickly taking over, both completely lost in the sensation of feeling and tasting each other. They only parted when air became a necessity, both breathing heavily. Jane attempted to pull Maura into another kiss but Maura stopped her.

"Maura…." Jane's voice was deeper than usual.

"Jane, I could hurt you."

"I _really_ don't care right now."

"Of course you don't. But I do, love." Maura moved off of Jane, lying in bed next to her. "Come here." She said as she pulled Jane close to her, wrapping her arms loosely around her, so the brunette's head was resting on her chest. She held her while stroking her arm softly. "I love you so much Jane. We don't need to rush things." Maura said kissing Jane's temple.

"I know." Jane sighed. "I love you so much."

They lay like that in silence for a while, with their fingers intertwined. Jane could hear Maura's heart beating; smell the fruity scent of her shampoo. It was so comforting and felt so right. It was perfect actually.

"Maur?"

"Yeah."

"I want to take you out on a date."

"I'd really like that." Maura smiled.

"Tomorrow?"

"Jane… how about when you feel better?"

"But I feel great."

Maura laughed at Jane's stubbornness. "Ok well…. What do you think about having a staying in date tomorrow, and then when you feel completely better, we can have a real date, where you get to pick me up and all?"

"I like how you think." Jane murmured, cuddling into Maura's embrace. She felt so loved and so safe. She always felt safe when she was with Maura. _Her_ Maura, even though Jane couldn't even start to comprehend how she had gotten so lucky, or what she had done to deserve the love of someone so incredibly perfect.

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I really, really love reviews. Just sayin! ;)

A/N2: Apparently this took a turn from angstville to fluffville and I think it's going to stay there. Probably, but who knows! ;) Also, I'm debating whether to keep going or end it in the next couple of chapters. Thank you all so much for reading, reviewing, etc!


	9. Chapter 9

**Hold My Heart**

**Chapter 9**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters.

**A/N:** **MegannRosemary** thank you for everything you do _always_, but most of all for just being you, mi querida.

**A/N2:** Omg over 100 reviews! I honestly never thought that would happen. I also wanted to thank (because I always want to and then I forget) all the anon reviews! I wish I could thank you all personally! You guys are the best!

Also thanks to **Whitebordeaux** for all your support and encouraging words! :)

* * *

When Maura woke up she couldn't feel her arm; they had fallen asleep and slept all night in the same position, her arms wrapped around Jane, and the brunette's head resting on her chest. But throughout the night Jane had turned over and she was now lying almost on top of Maura, one of her legs was in between the honey blondes' so that Jane's body was pressed up against hers. The feeling sent a jolt of electricity all over her body; they fit together perfectly. She couldn't wait to feel all of Jane's body against hers, without the layer of clothing in the way. But she knew she'd have to be patient and wait for Jane to recover. Lost in her thoughts, she almost gasped when she felt Jane's hand slide under her top and caress her skin softly. Jane grinned at Maura's reaction, and looked up to her.

"Good morning." Jane whispered, in that deeper than usual, sexy sleepy voice.

"Good morning." Maura smiled, giving Jane a slow, deep kiss.

"Wow…" Jane whispered, biting her lower lip.

"My thoughts exactly."

"Mmmm I don't want to get up. You're such a nice pillow." Jane said lazily.

Maura smiled at her comment, "You don't need to, but I should go make us some breakfast."

"Or not. Who needs breakfast?" Jane faced Maura, her hand roaming under her top, kissing her way up Maura's neck, until their lips met again. Maura's hands grazed up and down Jane's sides. Jane moaned into their kiss, the feeling of Maura's hands on her body sent shivers down her spine. She was caught by surprise at the sudden sharp pain she felt on her chest, and she wasn't quite able to hide it from Maura.

"Ow…" Jane winced.

"Jane…." Maura worried immediately, helping Jane lay down on her back.

"I'm fine Maur." But her voice said otherwise.

"I'm getting you some painkillers." Maura stated seriously.

"No, I don't need them. Please, don't worry so much. I just…"

"Just what, Jane?"

"I…. nothing…" She mumbled, embarrassed.

"Jane, you can talk to me."

Jane struggled with her words. "I just… _want you_… so badly." It was clear by her body language, that she'd barely managed to get that out.

"I want you too, Jane, so much. But I don't want to hurt you."

"I know, it's just… frustrating."

"I know it is, sweetheart. You'll be better in no time."

"But I want to be better nowww." Jane whined.

This was one of the many qualities that Maura found so endearing about Jane. She was like a child sometimes.

"I love you, Jane." Maura leaned over to give her a gentle kiss. "I'm going to go make breakfast. Behave while I'm gone!"

Jane smiled and shrugged as in saying, _don't I always_? She lasted a whole two minutes in bed, before she had to get up. She walked quietly into the kitchen, coming up behind Maura, sliding her arm across her waist, pulling her close, and brushing her lips against the honey blonde's neck. Maura shivered at the contact, and turned around in Jane's arms capturing her lips in a passionate kiss.

"I thought you said you'd behave." Maura said after she pulled back.

"I never agreed to that. Plus, I felt lonely." Jane gave her the most innocent smile she could manage, batting her eyelashes.

"Come on, breakfast is ready."

They ate breakfast together on a comfortable silence, Maura glancing at Jane every now and then. She was so glad to see the brunette had recovered her appetite, and looked much better with each passing day.

"That was delicious Maura, thank you." Jane helped her pick up the dishes and Maura walked in front of her, wrapping her arms around her waist, holding her tightly and resting her head on Jane's shoulder.

Jane struggled to put down the dishes and held her back, a little shocked at the tightness of Maura's embrace. She ran her hand up and down her back in a comforting motion. "What is it Maur? Are you ok?"

Maura looked up, tears running down her cheeks, which made Jane's heart physically ache. She had tried to be strong for Jane, and she had succeeded so far, but her strength was now faltering. "I'm sorry Jane. I… I'm just so happy and relieved that you're going to be ok, and to see that you're doing better. I was so scared…" Maura trailed off unable to finish what she was going to say, as fresh tears kept flowing.

Jane tenderly brushed away her tears, and held her close again, placing a kiss on the top of her head. "Shhh, hey it's ok. I'm ok Maur." She couldn't stand to see Maura crying, it was one of the few things that almost instantly brought tears to her eyes. "Come with me; let's sit down for a minute." She guided Maura to the living room couch, never letting go of her. Maura snuggled impossibly close against her chest, while Jane held her, running her fingers through silky honey blonde hair, attempting to reassure her. She should have realized how hard the past few days had been on Maura and that a breakdown was bound to happen sooner or later.

A few minutes went by, and Maura seemed to be able to calm herself a bit. She relaxed into Jane's embrace; her eyes closed, breathing in Jane's scent, something that always helped her relax.

"Sweetie, are you ok?" Jane asked, still stroking her hair.

"Yeah, I'm sorry Jane, it's the last thing you need…"

"Hey… no need to apologize, ok? You have been through a lot, and you're exhausted. Why don't you go lie down for a while, so you'll be rested for tonight?"

"Will you come with me?" Maura asked, tentatively.

"I'll stay with you for a little bit, but I have a date to plan!" Jane grinned.

"Yes, an inside-your-apartment date, Jane." Maura reminded her.

"I know, I know. That doesn't mean it can't still be romantic. Come on, let's get you to bed."

They both walked into the bedroom, Maura got settled in bed and Jane stayed with her for a while. When she was sure Maura was asleep, she quietly slipped out of the room, shutting the door after her.

Jane made a few calls to plan everything for that night. She was nervous, but excited at the same time, and wanted everything to be as perfect as possible. When she thought everything was set for their date, she went back into the room quietly, picked an outfit to wear and quietly lay down next to Maura, attempting to rest for a little bit. It didn't work, as her mind was on overdrive with all the thoughts about having a date with Maura. She still couldn't believe it. Her heart was pounding like a nervous teenager.

Jane lost track of time, when she felt Maura stirring next to her, and then roll over on her side facing Jane.

"Hi." Jane smiled, "Did you have a nice nap?"

"Mmmm, yeah I did. Did you sleep at all?"

Jane just shook her head. "I couldn't." She brushed her lips over Maura's, unable to resist being this close to her. "I'm going to start getting ready; it will take me a while, one handed and all. You are not allowed out of this room, ok?"

"Of course, I'll be on room arrest and behave." Maura tried to joke.

"Good one, Maur!" Jane smirked and disappeared into the bathroom. She was there for a while, trying to get ready without having full mobility of one arm wasn't easy. She got dressed, fixed her hair as well as she could, and when she was ready she cracked the door open, and called Maura.

"Yeah?" Maura replied.

"Can you turn around and don't look please? I'm going into the living room. You can use the bathroom now, but don't come out of the room until I tell you to, ok?"

"Ok." Maura had to admit the curiosity was killing her, but she did as she was told.

When Jane left the room, Maura went into the bathroom to start getting ready. It was a good thing that she had plenty of clothes at Jane's apartment, so she had a few good options to pick from. She smiled to herself; they were finally going to have their first date.

* * *

Once everything was completely set up, Jane asked her to come into the living room. When Maura saw Jane, her jaw almost dropped. The brunette looked stunning. She was wearing form fitting dark jeans, and a white button up shirt that was easier to put on with her injuries, plus it didn't hurt that it was a shirt she knew Maura loved.

"Jane, you look…." Maura's eyes scanned her from head to toes.

"Doctor Isles, are you speechless?" Jane teased.

"Breathtaking." Maura finished.

"Thank you. I'm glad you approve."

Maura walked over to her, looking absolutely perfect. The black skirt she was wearing enhanced her curves in all the right places. The silky crimson blouse made her eyes look even brighter and revealed just enough cleavage to drive Jane crazy with anticipation. Her hair was perfectly styled in loose honey blonde curls that framed her face. Jane couldn't take her eyes off of her.

"Maura, y- you're…"

"Look who's speechless now, Detective."

"I just don't have a word that would do you justice…. You're so gorgeous."

Maura walked over to Jane, who was still mesmerized, and kissed her tenderly.

"Wait… I got these for you." Jane said, clumsily handing her a flower bouquet.

"Jane, they are beautiful. Thank you."

Only now Maura managed to take a look around the apartment. There was a candle lit dinner set up in the living room floor, on top of blanket, just like a picnic except this one was indoors. Everything looked beautiful and so romantic. How Jane had been able to pull all this off was beyond Maura's understanding.

"Jane, everything looks amazing. I can't believe you did all this."

"I have my ways." Jane winked. "Um… I probably should have told you that pants would have been more comfortable. But then I wouldn't get to see those amazing legs."

Jane held her hand out to Maura, to help her settle on the pillows that were on the floor, which Maura did gracefully, and then sat next to her. She offered her wine, Maura's favorite of course, and served the dinner she had ordered from one of those fancy restaurants that Maura loved. They ate while they made small, easy conversation, laughing at each other's jokes. God, that laugh and that smile, it absolutely made Jane melt, and she'd do anything to hear it all the time. When they were done eating, Jane cleared the plates and walked back to the living room. She stood next to Maura, offering her hand to her.

"Would you dance with me, Maur?" Jane asked, shyly.

Maura's face lit up. "I'd love to." She replied, raising her arms to meet Jane's hands, allowing her pull her up.

Maura wrapped her arms around Jane's waist, looking up at her and seeing so much love reflected in those deep brown eyes.

Jane ran her hands up and down Maura's back, not being able to tear her eyes away from those bright hazel eyes staring back at her. She tenderly brushed a strand of honey blonde hair behind Maura's ear, then gently cupped her face with her hand and leaned down to meet her lips, tasting and exploring Maura's sweet mouth. They swayed to the soft music playing in the background, while they continued kissing and caressing each other.

_Say it's true, there's nothing like me and you_

_I'm not alone, tell me you feel it too_

_And I would run away_

_I would run away, yeah..., yeah_

_I would run away_

_I would run away with you_

_Cause I am falling in love with you_

_No never I'm never gonna stop_

_Falling in love with you_

_Close the door, lay down upon the floor_

_And by candlelight, make love to me through the night_

_Cause I have run away_

_I have run away, yeah..., yeah_

_I have run away, run away_

_I have run away with you_

_Cause I am falling in love with you_

_No never I'm never gonna stop_

_Falling in love with you..._

_With you..._

_And I would runaway_

_I would runaway, yeah..., yeah_

_I would runaway_

_I would runaway with you_

_Cause I am falling in love with you_

_No never I'm never gonna stop_

_Falling in love with you..._

_Falling in love with you_

_No never I'm never gonna stop falling in love with you_

_With you, my love, with you..._

When the song ended, they reluctantly pulled back from the long kiss. Maura buried her face on Jane's neck, inhaling the brunette's unique scent that she adored. Jane placed a kiss on the top of her head; she trailed her fingertip from Maura's shoulders down her arms, until she reached her hands. She then guided her back to the blanket on the living room floor, both settling back down on the pillows Jane had placed there.

Maura closed the distance between them, and kissed Jane slowly at first, but the kisses just got hungrier and more passionate. One of Maura's hands was behind Jane's neck and the other one on the small of her back, pulling her flush against her body. Jane's hand trailed along Maura's perfect legs, needing to feel her warm, smooth skin.

"Maura…"

"Jane, we can't."

"Maur, I need you right now. Please don't make me beg."

"If we are doing this now, we are doing it my way. I don't want you straining yourself. Is that clear?"

"Anything you say…. But first I need to ask you something, or this won't feel as perfect as I want it to be."

"What is it?"

"Will you be my girlfriend, Maura?" Jane asked, hopeful.

"Nothing would make me happier, Jane." Maura whispered and leaned over kissing Jane hungrily.

She started slowly unbuttoning Jane's shirt, revealing a black lace bra that Maura never would have thought Jane owned. Her eyes travelled over Jane's body, her firm tanned abdomen, framed by the white open shirt. Maura couldn't even think straight. She captured Jane's lips in a long, sensual kiss, as she started sliding the shirt down her arms. Maura's hands roamed over Jane's toned body.

She helped Jane lie down, kissing her neck softly, moving down to her chest then stomach and stopping when she reached the top of her jeans. She easily unbuttoned them and slid them off of Jane's legs, being able to fully appreciate the beauty of the woman lying in front of her. They held each other's gaze for a moment, eyes burning with desire.

Maura slid off her skirt and moved on top of Jane, carefully straddling her hips. She started undoing her own blouse, letting it drop to the floor, not caring that it would be completely wrinkled.

When Jane caught sight of the matching scraps of red lace, she was sure she had never seen anyone as beautiful and sexy as Maura. She let her hands graze the soft, milky skin, as if to reassure herself that she was real.

Maura leaned over on top of her, kissing her neck which caused Jane to arch her back, allowing her to easily unclasp her bra.

"You're so beautiful." Maura whispered as she slowly continued kissing her way down Jane's body, paying attention to every single spot of exposed skin. She brushed her lips along the slope between her breasts, her taut stomach, feeling her lovers' muscles twitching under her lips. She continued until she was settled between Jane's legs.

Jane closed her eyes tightly; she couldn't believe this was happening. She felt as she was about to explode, her heart racing, chest heaving. She had never felt something like this in her whole life. The sensations were threatening to consume her completely, every movement of Maura's tongue bringing her closer to the edge.

"M-maur…. I need to…. see you, please." Jane said between ragged breaths.

Maura complied and moved up, kissing Jane with so much passion, her hand sliding down to where her mouth had been. She continued her motions until Jane started trembling beneath her, gasping for air and calling her name. Maura held her tightly until she felt Jane's breathing return to normal and her body relax against her. She pulled back, kissing Jane's cheek softly, when she noticed the tears.

"Jane… are you in pain?" Maura asked, concern washing over her face.

"No… no Maur. I'm ok…. Better than ok." Jane answered, wiping away tears she hadn't been aware of.

"Why are you crying then, love?"

"I'm just… overwhelmed. A good overwhelmed, Maur. I love you so much."

"I'm completely in love with you, Jane." Maura kissed her again, lying next to her and wrapping her arms around her body.

When Jane had recovered, she turned to face Maura, her hand trailing sensually along her body. She closed the distance, kissing Maura while her hand travelled down.

Maura hesitated for a second, "Jane…" her voice laced with desire.

"I'll be careful Maur. I promise."

Maura nodded slightly, not being able to form words. Jane's touch was unlike anything she had ever felt. Their kisses were heated, demanding, almost desperate. Maura didn't think she'd be able to hold it together for long, even if she never wanted this experience to end. Soon enough she found herself quivering uncontrollably under Jane's touch, moaning into their kiss.

They lay there a tangled mess of legs and arms, reveling in feeling each other's body, hearts thudding loudly, heat travelling through their bodies. Neither had ever felt so incredibly happy and complete, and nothing else mattered. Jane reached for another blanket from the couch, and covered them both with it. She held Maura as close as physically possible while they both drifted off in each other's arms.

A few hours later Maura woke up, disoriented for a few seconds until she realized where they were. A smiled crept up her lips and she sighed, watching the gorgeous and adorable sleeping brunette. She knew she had to get Jane to bed, or she wouldn't be happy in the morning.

"Jane." She whispered, peppering soft kisses all over Jane's face. No answer at all, Jane was completely out.

"Sweetheart, you need to get up." Maura said a little louder, gently running her hand through Jane's arm.

"Don't wanna…." Jane groaned.

Maura smiled at her and her heart just melted. A physical impossibility, Maura knew that, but Jane made her feel things that couldn't be described in any scientific terms.

With conviction, Maura helped a half asleep Jane sit up. "Come on, you need to help me get you to bed Jane." Maura slipped Jane's arm around her shoulder and attempted to make her stand. Jane did, on very unsteady feet, but somehow Maura was able to get her to cooperate. She helped her into bed and lay down snuggling close to her.

This night had been amazing, and Maura wanted to have many more just like this. She never even considered that it was possible to love anybody as much as she loved her best friend, her lover, her _girlfriend_, her Jane, and to be loved back just as much.

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I hope you guys liked it; it was definitely not the easiest to write. Thank you all so much for reading, reviewing etc! :)

A/N3: I'm a bit torn, I love fluff, but I can't keep writing just fluff. Sooo, I either need to end this story soon, or find some angsty plot twist. Any thoughts?


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